Parenting Advice

A couple of days after I went back to work from my maternity leave, a coworker said to me "Parenting is the hardest thing you will ever do". "No one ever tells you that it is so hard that sometimes you feel like you just might not survive it".

I have played those words over in my mind so many times I cannot even tell you. I find such great comfort in them because it lets me know that I am normal. I feel so blessed that 95% of the time my kids are great. They are sweet, well mannered, and I can just squeeze them up and love them. But then there is the other 5%.

Now Jaxton isn't really old enough to be able to help it. His "wear me out" moments (to this point) have just been about him being sick and me wanting to be able to make it all better. Ashlynn on the other hand.....that child's 5% makes me truly question if I will survive this.

We had a weekend full of those "I'm not going to survive this" moments this past weekend. It was like someone had stolen my precious little angel and replaced her with a complete and total fire breathing dragon. When she gets going there is no stopping her. She is so strong and determined it ridiculous.

On Sunday afternoon Ashlynn turned back into her sweet normal happy smiling self. Thank goodness! My problem is I feel like I have no control when she gets out of control. I started seeking some parenting advice from friends. I have got to find some way to be able to handle and stop these fits before another happens.

Parenting advice seems simple enough, right? Well not so much. you see I took 9 hours of child development in college. I get multiple hours of parenting staff development each year. I've read books professionally about effective discipline. I am a kindergarten teacher for goodness sake. Parents ask me for advice all the time. Discipline is part of my job. Not saying all this to sound like a know it all, just saying I have tried every trick in the book.

I did however get exactly what I was looking for. That magic wand that I get to wave next time the 5% decides to rear it's ugly head. The funny part about it, the friend that gave it to me doesn't even know she did it. In fact it didn't come in the form of advice at all.

On Monday I got a Thanksgiving card from a sweet sweet friend. Inside the card she told me all the reasons she was thankful for me. Part of what she wrote said " Your sweet silly smile always brightens my day. Thank you so much for being such a strong, determined, kind, smart, goal drive inspiration to those around you. " I read this statement a thousand times. At first I just was so flattered that she said such sweet things to me and then I realized that is Ashlynn. She is strong, she is determined, she is passionate, smart, and once she gets a goal in her mind she works like crazy to complete it.

These are all qualities I was getting complemented on, but yet those same qualities are pushing me to the edge when it comes to my child. I don't think my qualities are always a good thing. They have gotten me into my fair share of trouble. However, I am very proud of who I am and I am very proud of the daughter I am raising. Instead of trying to stop those behaviors in Ashlynn I need to be teaching her how to effectively use them.

Now finding the patience while doing that, well that's a whole other story. Wish me luck...